About Learning to listen to your inner voices and daring to heal....Share
Yesterday at 11:47pm
I was delighted to see your tag and to read your poem, on my wall Betsy.
Many thanks for having the courage to share your pain and your inner process back into healing.
It is a generous act on your part, and it may help others who may be going through difficult times themselves.
I believe that our harshest critics and saboteurs are inside us.
We hold ourselves to unrealistic strict emotional standards, and we rarely learn to be our own friends, our own coaches, our own supporters.
We internalized so deep, society's voices that say that it is never OK to feel sad, crushed, hurt, that it is a failure to feel pain......
When we go through difficult times, we do not need OTHERS, to help us.... We need OUR OWN inner support system to help us.
But so few of us, learn to develop this inner support system and to call upon it, when we need it most.
It is MUCH MORE than positive thinking...
MUCH, MUCH, MORE....
It takes listening to our inner dialog with patience.
It takes, identifying the major players in our inner dialog and learning to see where they are coming from, what is their agenda and how to turn them around, so they can help us.
People do not know, (and it makes me sad,) but, ALL THE HELP YOU NEED,.....IS RIGHT THERE INSIDE YOU...
You asked me what do I mean by learning to identify the major players in our inner dialog, and learning to see where they are coming from, what is their agenda and how to turn them around, so they can help us?...
I will try to elaborate on this.
I must start at the very beginning.
We all hear inner voices.
This alone, is a major concept that people are afraid to recognize, to understand, and to see.
We associate inner voices with the mental illness of schizophrenia.
But this is a ridiculously short sighted view of how we operate and how feelings originate.
Associating our inner voices with mental illness, is a gross and harmful generalization that robs us of one of the strongest tools we have, to advance on our path into true and complete healing.
Yes, we all hear voices.
These voices are what we listen to, or learn to ignore, based on our tendencies and desires....., conscious and unconscious tendencies towards dwelling with pain or joy.
We must learn to hear their message clearly,.... To challenge the validity of their message to us...... To see the effect and impact that adopting and believing their message, may have on us.
These internalized voices come from years of living in the world.
They speak to us through the voices of people we've listened to.
They come from our parents, siblings, friends, teachers, people we've met, people who helped us, TV, movies, books we read, spiritual teachers and many more.
We do have inner filters.
We do not take it ALL in.
We take in, what fits with our current emotional body and its tendencies.
Early in life, and all through the course of our living, we internalize a certain amount of preprogrammed mechanism, which is how we filter our life's experiences.
So, when we are about to make a move in life, these voices speak to us.
They either encourage us to move ahead, take on challenges, dare to feel, or they try to shut us down... Try to berate us..... Try to put us down with promises of disappointment and future pain.
Our feelings, are usually a response to these voices and their messages to us.
We get angry and depressed when these voices tell us that we cannot to things.
That we MUST keep on living in pain.... That life is about suffering.... That we should not even try to be blissfully happy....
That letting go of the pain, means that we are letting others off the hook.
That we are allowing injustice to run rampant in the world, simply by allowing our previous partners, to be forgiven by us.....
We feel disillusioned when these voices put down our ambitions.
When they try to keep us under a rock, or stewing in our most familiar pain....
And we soar with happiness and joy, when the voices encourage us.
When they help us see things clearly and embrace true healing.
Now, the second step, after recognizing that we all hear voices, is to try and IDENTIFY these voices, or where are they coming from AND what is their agenda.
You see Betsy, the voices, do not always work for us.
Some of them work for an agenda somebody else has.
I will give you an example here, that comes to me randomly.
Let us say that you hear an inner voice saying that you will never find a man that is kind and understanding, a man that will love you deeply and will be devoted to you, loyal to your bond, and who will hold your highest good in his mind and heart.
You do not immediately have to accept this voice..... Instead, you try to identify WHERE is it coming from? and WHO does it sound like?
Let's say that upon further reflection, you identify that it sounds a little like your mother.
Let's say that you can see the patterns of HER LIFE, that made this message TRUE FOR HER..... Not for you... But for her.... Yet, she said it often and you heard it repeatedly....
Now, let's say, that after you've analyzed it, you found out that most of this, will NOT BE APPLICABLE to you at all..... But yes, it was and is, very applicable to her life.
Now, that you heard, identified and analyzed the message your heard, you are able to make up YOUR OWN MIND.
You are able to say to this voice: "Thank you for sharing, but I do not think that this apply here. I do think that FOR ME, I could expect to find and connect with a man on a much higher level. To create a more true and satisfying bond with a man."
Most voices you will hear have the agenda of their speaker, attached to them.
It is up to you to listen, to identify, to analyze, and to accept or to dismiss, according to your own better and higher judgement.
A good compass, in exploring this process, will be how it FEELS to you.
If the message that the voice is sending you, make you feel sad, depressed, lonely, disempowered, than it is probably false and with a hidden agenda.
If it makes you happy or joyous, it is worth proceeding... But also do this with cautiousness.
We often internalize voices that push us to dream silly and meaningless dreams..... that are way too high and do not bring with them much REAL joy at the end.
Negative messages can come in many forms.
Some will look like "good" dreams and "good" ideas... But they are not.
They will feel like you are being encouraged to dream higher, but they are really sending you on a goose chase with nothing good in it for you.
And trust you can do it.
We are ALL, beings of supreme intelligence.
We can do SO MUCH MORE than we give ourselves credit for.
I hope this helps....
I will be happy to help clarify more... But I need to go to enjoy my spa day now.
I hear an inner voice saying to me: "Enough philosophy girl.... Go have some FUN!"
And I answer back: "Who says that this is not fun? I am having a good time writing to my friend Betsy, about this... Sharing my wisdom.... Who are you to try and stop me?...."
And the voice tells me: "Darling, Tali, you said enough... Let them digest this.. And go soak your body in the wonderful hot tub with the curtains and cucumber water.... Where the creams are filled with essential oils and the music is soft.... You KNOW you want to... "
I cannot argue... The voice is right.
I go now...
Written 5 hours ago · Comment Jacob Zur Enjoy the bath... :-)
5 hours ago · LikeUnlike · Tali Landsman Thank you darling Jacob... I am going right now..
Hope you have a good night. (it is evening in Israel now... Right?)
5 hours ago · LikeUnlike · Jacob Zur yes,,, evening here
bath is a great place to think :-)
but don't do it... just enkoy
5 hours ago · LikeUnlike · Joelene Verster I know this note is for Betsy but must say thank you for having posted it Tali.. Its given me something to think about. Enjoy the hot tub :)
4 hours ago via Facebook Mobile · LikeUnlike · 2 people
· Sydney Anne Bristo Look at every path closely and deliberately. Does this path have heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn’t, it is of no use. Both paths lead nowhere; but one has a heart, the other doesn’t.
...One makes for a joyful journey; as long as you follow it, you are one with it. The other will make you curse your life. One makes you strong; the other weakens you.
A path without heart is never enjoyable. You have to work hard even to take it. On the other hand, a path with heart is easy, it does not make you work at liking it.
Great piece, It’s nice to read something encouraging others instead of trying to scare the daylights out of them for a change! Your inner voice is your gut and rarely are they wrong. :)♥See More
4 hours ago · LikeUnlike · 3 people
· Jules Landsman Thanks for writing down so clearly your advice to learn to hear our inner voices, to reflect on who they belong to and if they come to us at that moment with positive or limiting intentions, and to listen and move in the right direction. I have heard and accepted mindlessly, or heard and ignored my inner voices for so long, and I am trying to learn from your good example to do things differently...
3 hours ago · LikeUnlike · 4 people
Tali Landsman and 3 others like this.
· Lisa-Jane Myers oh dear Tali - thank you this is so perfect today thank you for your sharing and generosity i really needed to hear this today-love ya gal, love ya work, I am one lucky lady knowing you mwah xx
2 hours ago · LikeUnlike · 1 person
· Betsy Byrd Lawson i'm looking forward to reading your note,tali, in the morning when my mind is freshest. i love the thought that we are opening a dialogue that the guys and gals can benefit from. a libra, i have always loved my emotions the most but we all know there are times when they can get out of control. that's when the mind must go to work. thanks for doing this so quickly and putting your own work on hold.♥
32 minutes ago · · Bishwanath Singh: Unless one listens to his/her inner voice, he/she can 't strive hard to get perfection in his/her life.I am extremely happy that my esteemed friend Tali Landsman has come out with its modalities together with methodology as how to attain... it. It is true that We feel disillusioned when some of the voices put down our ambitions unless we strive hard to overcome it by listening our inner voice. I am happy that Betsy Byrd Lawson and many like us have shown their deep concern on this vital subject worth imbibing in our life to have positive result as suggested by Tali Landsman
about a minute ago · LikeUnlike ·