Forgiveness is the best virtue that we posses by Bishwa Nath Singh, Coordinator, Global Peace and Universal Brotherhood.
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(by Bishwa Nath Singh on Tuesday, May 24, 2011 at 12:37am)
Forgiveness is best interpreted as the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, or ceasing to demand punishment or any restrictions. In another words, the forgiveness is termed as to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offense or debt'. The concept and benefits of forgiveness have been explored in religious thought, the social sciences and medicine. Forgiveness may be considered simply in terms of the person who forgives including forgiving themselves, in terms of the person forgiven or in terms of the relationship between the forgiver and the person forgiven. In some contexts, forgiveness may be granted without any expectation of restorative justice, and without any response on the part of the offender Most of the world religions include teachings on the nature of forgiveness, and many of these teachings provide an underlying basis for many varying modern day traditions and practices of forgiveness. Some religious doctrines or philosophies place greater emphasis on the need for humans to find some sort of divine forgiveness for their own shortcomings, others place greater emphasis on the need for humans to practice forgiveness of one another, yet others make little or no distinction between human and divine forgiveness. In the New Testament, Jesus had spoken of the importance of Christians forgiving or showing mercy towards others. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus repeatedly spoke of forgiveness, “Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.” Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you; leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.” “But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Jesus had asked for God's forgiveness of those who had crucified him. Jesus had said, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.'" Islam teaches that God is Al-Ghaffur "The All-Forgiving", and is the original source of all forgiveness The forgiveness often requires the repentance of those being forgiven. Depending on the type of wrong committed, forgiveness can come either directly from Allah, or from one's fellow man who received the wrong. In the case of divine forgiveness, the asking for divine forgiveness via repentance is important. In the case of human forgiveness, it is important to both forgive, and to be forgiven. Islam does not teach universalism, however, and the Qur'an states explicitly that God will not forgive idol worship The Quran never allows for violent behavior on the part of Muslim believers, except in the cases of defending one's religion, one's life, or one's property. Outside of this, the Qu'ran makes no allowances for violent behavior. The Quran makes it clear that, whenever possible, it is better to forgive another than to attack another. The Qur'an describes the believers (Muslims) as those who, avoid gross sins and vice, and when angered they forgive and says that although the just requital for an injustice is an equivalent retribution, those who pardon and maintain righteousness are rewarded by GOD. He does not love the unjust. To receive forgiveness from God there are three requirements: (1) Recognizing the offense itself and its admission before God.(2)Making a commitment not to repeat the offense and (3)Asking for forgiveness from God. If the offense was committed against another human being, or against society, a fourth condition is added; (1)Recognizing the offense before those against whom offense was committed and before God.(2)Committing oneself not to repeat the offense.(3)Doing whatever needs to be done to rectify the offense (within reason) and asking pardon of the offended party. And (4)Asking God for forgiveness., Muslims are taught many phrases and words to keep repeating daily asking God's forgiveness. For example: (1)Astaghfiru-Allah, "I ask forgiveness from Allah" (2)Subhanaka-Allah humma wa bi hamdika wa ash-hadu al la Ilaha illa Anta astaghfiruka wa atubu ilayk, "Glory be to You, Allah, and with You Praise (thanks) and I bear witness that there is no deity but You, I ask Your forgiveness and I return to You in obedience".Islamic teaching presents the Prophet Muhammad as an example of someone who would forgive others for their ignorance, even those who might have once considered themselves to be his enemies. One example of Muhammad's practice of forgiveness can be found in the Hadith, the body of early Islamic literature about the life of Muhammad. This account is as follows:The Prophet was the most forgiving person. He was ever ready to forgive his enemies. In Bahai’s faith, love the creatures for the sake of God and not for themselves. One will never become angry or impatient if he/she loves them for the sake of God. Humanity is not perfect. There are imperfections in every human being, and one will always become unhappy if he/she looks toward the people themselves. But if one looks toward God, he/she will love them and be kind to them, for the world of God is the world of perfection and complete mercy. In Buddhism, forgiveness is seen as a practice to prevent harmful thoughts from causing havoc on one’s mental well-being. Buddhism recognizes that feelings of hatred and ill-will leave a lasting effect on our mind action. Instead, Buddhism encourages the cultivation of thoughts that leave a wholesome effect. When resentments have already arisen, the Buddhist view is to calmly proceed to release them by going back to their roots. Buddhism centers on release from delusion and suffering through meditation and receiving insight into the nature of reality. Buddhism places much emphasis on the concepts of loving kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy and equanimity, as a means to avoiding resentments in the first place. In Jainism, forgiveness is one of the main virtues that need to be cultivated by the Jains. Kṣamāpanā or supreme forgiveness forms part of one of the ten characteristics of dharmaIn the Jain prayer, (pratikramana) Jains repeatedly seek forgiveness from various creatures—even from ekindriyas or single sensed beings like plants and microorganisms that they may have harmed while eating and doing routine activities. Forgiveness is asked by uttering the phrase, Micchāmi dukkaḍaṃ. Micchāmi dukkaḍaṃ is a Prakrit language phrase literally meaning "may all the evil that has been done be fruitless." By practicing repentance, a soul gets rid of sins, and commits no transgressions; he who correctly practises prāyaṣcitta gains the road and the reward of the road, he wins the reward of good conduct. By begging forgiveness he obtains happiness of mind; thereby he acquires a kind disposition towards all kinds of living beings; by this kind disposition he obtains purity of character and freedom from fear. In Hinduism, the very concept of performing atonement from one's wrongdoing ( Penance), and asking for forgiveness is very much a part of the practice of its religious values. Penance is related to the law of action. Action is a sum of all that an individual has done, is currently doing and will do. The effects of those deeds and these deeds actively create present and future experiences, thus making one responsible for one's own life, and the pain in others.As per Srimad Bhagvadam, it is found that King Yudhishthira had said: Anger is the slayer of men and is again their protector. Know this, O thou possessed of great wisdom, that anger is the root of all prosperity and all adversity. O thou beautiful one, he that suppresses his anger earns prosperity. That man, again, who always gives way to anger, reaps adversity from his fierce anger. It is seen in this world that anger is the cause of destruction of every creature. How then can one like me indulge his anger, which is so destructive of the world? The angry man commits sin. The angry man kills even his preceptors. The angry man insults even his superiors in harsh words. The man that is angry fails to distinguish between what should be said and what should not.here is no act that an angry man may not do, no word that an angry man may not utter. From anger a man may slay one that deserves not to be slain, and may worship one that deserves to be slain. The angry man may even send his own soul to the regions of Yama. Beholding all these faults, the wise control their anger, desirous of obtaining high prosperity both in this and the other world. It is for this that they of tranquil souls have banished wrath. How can one like us indulge in it then? O daughter of Draupada, reflecting upon all this, my anger is not excited. One that acts not against a man, whose wrath has been up, rescues himself as also others from great fear. In fact, he may be regarded to be the physician of the two himself and angry man.If a weak man persecuted by others, foolishly becomes angry towards men that are mightier than he, he then becomes himself the cause of his own destruction. And in respect of one who thus deliberately throws away his life, there are no regions hereafter to gain. Therefore, O daughter of Draupada, it has been said that a weak man should always suppress his wrath. And the wise man also who though persecuted, suffers not his wrath to be roused, joyeth in the other world, having passed his persecutor over in indifference. It is for this reason has it been said that a wise man, whether strong or weak, should ever forgive his persecutor even when the latter is in the straits. It is for this that the virtuous applaud them that have conquered their wrath. Indeed, it is the opinion of the virtuous that the honest and forgiving man is ever victorious. Truth is more beneficial than untruth; and gentleness is more beneficial than cruel behavior. How can one like me, therefore, even for the purpose of slaying Duryodhana, exhibit anger which has so many faults and which the virtuous banish from their souls? They that are regarded by the learned of foresight, as possessed of true force of character, are certainly those who are wrathful in outward show only. Men of learning and of true insight call him to be possessed of force of character who by his wisdom can suppress his risen wrath. O thou of fair hips, the angry man sees not things in their true light. The man that is angry sees not his way, nor respects persons. The angry man kills even those that deserve not to be killed. The man of wrath slays even his preceptors. Therefore, the man possessing force of character should ever banish wrath to a distance. The man that is overwhelmed with wrath acquires not with ease generosity, dignity, courage, skill, and other attributes belonging to real force of character. A man by forsaking anger can exhibit proper energy, whereas, O wise one, it is highly difficult for the angry man to exhibit his energy at the proper time! The ignorant always regard anger as equivalent to energy. Wrath, however, has been given to man for the destruction of the world. The man, therefore, who wishes to behave properly, must ever forsake anger. Even one, who has abandoned the excellent virtues of his own order, it is certain, indulges in wrath. If fools, of mind without light, transgress in every respect, how, O faultless one, can one like me transgress (like them)? If amongst men there were not persons equal unto the earth in forgiveness, there would be no peace among men but continued strife caused by wrath. If the injured return their injuries, if one chastised by his superior were to chastise his superior in return, the consequence would be the destruction of every creature, and sin also would prevail in the world. If the man who has ill speeches from another, returns those speeches afterwards; If the injured man returns his injuries: if the chastised person chastises in return; if fathers slay sons, sons slay fathers, and if husbands slay wives, and wives slay husbands; then how can birth take place in a world where anger prevails so! For, O thou of handsome face, know that the birth of creatures is due to peace! If the kings also, O Draupadi, gives way to wrath, his subjects soon meet with destruction. Wrath, therefore, has for its consequence the destruction and the distress of the people. And because it is seen that there are in the world men who are forgiving like the Earth, it is therefore that creatures derive their life and prosperity beautiful one, one should forgive under every injury. It has been said that the continuation of species is due to man being forgiving. He, indeed, is a wise and excellent person who has conquered his wrath and shows forgiveness even when insulted, oppressed, and angered by a strong person. The man of power, who controls his wrath, has (for his enjoyment) numerous everlasting regions; while he that is angry, is called foolish, and meets with destruction both in this and the other world. The illustrious and forgiving Maharshi Kashyapa has, in this respect, sung the following verses in honour of men that are forgiving. Forgiveness is virtue; forgiveness is sacrifice, forgiveness is the Vedas, forgiveness is the Shruti. He that knows this is capable of forgiving everything. Forgiveness is Brahma; forgiveness is truth; forgiveness is stored ascetic merit; forgiveness protects the ascetic merit of the future; forgiveness is asceticism; forgiveness is holiness; and by forgiveness is it that the universe is held together. Persons that are forgiving attain to the regions obtainable by those that have performed meritorious sacrifices, or those that are well conversant with the Vedas, or those that have high ascetic merit. Those that perform Vedic sacrifices as also those that perform the meritorious rites of religion obtain other regions. Men of forgiveness, however, obtain those much adored regions that are in the world of Brahma. Forgiveness is the might of the mighty; forgiveness is sacrifice; forgiveness is quiet of mind. Can one like us abandon forgiveness, which is such, and in which are established Brahma, and truth, and wisdom and the worlds? The man of wisdom should ever forgive, for when he is capable of forgiving everything, he attains to Brahma. The world belongs to those that are forgiving; the other world is also theirs. The forgiving acquires honors here and a state of blessedness hereafter. Those men that ever conquer their wrath by forgiveness obtain the higher regions. Therefore has it been said that forgiveness is the highest virtue.” Those are the verses sung by Kashyapa in respect of those that are ever forgiving. Having listened, O Draupadi, to these verses in respect of forgiveness, content you! Give not way to thy wrath! Our grandsire, the son of Santanu, will worship peace; Krishna, the son of Devaki will worship peace; the preceptor Drona and Vidura called Kshatriya will both speak of peace; Kripa and Sanjaya also will preach peace. And Somadatta and Yuyutsu and Drona’s son and our grandsire Vyasa, every one of them speaks always of peace. Ever urged by these towards peace, the King (Dhritarashtra) will, I think, return us our kingdom. If however, he yields to temptation, he will meet with destruction. O lady, a crisis has come in the history of Bharatas for plunging them into calamity!Addressing Dhritarashtra, Vidura had said: as we find in Srimad Bhagvatam that there is one only defect in forgiving persons, and not another; that defect is that people take a forgiving person to be weak. That defect, however, should not be taken into consideration, for forgiveness is a great power. Forgiveness is a virtue of the weak, and an ornament of the strong. Forgiveness subdues all in this world; what is there that forgiveness cannot achieve? What can a wicked person do unto him who carries the nectar of forgiveness in his hand? Fire falling on the grassless ground is extinguished of itself. And unforgiving individual defiles himself with many enormities. Righteousness is the one highest good; and forgiveness is the one supreme peace; knowledge is supreme contentment; and benevolence and sole happiness. Nevertheless to mention that the forgiveness is the most precious gift that we have got from our creator. It is a release from the burden of anger and pain. When one chooses to forgive, he/she chooses to live in the present and the future instead of the past. It does not mean to forget but it does mean to release and go on. Forgiveness doesn't happen on its own, he/she must choose to forgive. Forgiving doesn't always mean resuming a relationship with whoever has hurt you. If a person won't meet you halfway or has been abusive, it may be better to forgive simply to make your own life less stressful, but continue to keep your distance that way, one can protect oneself but still reap the benefits. One can try the following tips for mending a broken bond :((1). Get the frustration - tell your story to a few close friends. This will help you explore your feelings about the rift and obtain a clear sense of perspective, (2.) Focus on what's in it for you - it's not always about who was right. Remind yourself that forgiving can free you to move on with your life. Tell yourself that the point is to reduce angst. After all, living well is the best revenge, (3.) Breathe in calm - instead of tensing up or starting in on your inner rant, inhale and exhale deeply or relax in whatever way appeals to you and (4) Turn the details of your story around - victims don't have control of their lives; heroes do. So make yourself the hero of your own saga. Think of it this way; although someone else may have precipitated your misery, whether you stay miserable is entirely up to you. You may have been hurt by something that your partner did to you. You may have been hurt because your expectations weren't met. You may have been hurt and you don't even remember why. You may have done something to someone else that you are sorry for. And you remember the pain and carry it with you like a grudge everywhere you go. When your burden becomes too great, it becomes the relationship, it consumes your life and it changes who you are and what your relationships can be. It is a wall between you and the intimacy that you seek. When one forgives: Forgiveness is defined as: giving up resentment against or the desire to punish; stop being angry with; pardon. (1)You relieve yourself of the burden of the past. You shed the hurt, pain, anger, and loneliness. You can begin to heal and (2) you give the person you forgive even yourself the freedom to live in peace and to be able to change for the better. Let us be very clear in our mind that (1) Forgiveness is not forgetting. (2)The pain may not be completely gone. One can forgive and still grieve a loss or feel pain from a wound. (3)Damage and wounds can take time to repair and (4) Forgiveness does not deny responsibility for behavior. You have simply committed to not hold the other person in debt. Individual forgiveness is nothing but to forgive yourself for judging yourself for not being worthy of love, happiness and joy. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of happiness. You are worthy of joy. Stop judging yourself. Have the strength and courage to allow you to be vulnerable. Be kind and loving to you. Practice holding a positive vision for yourself. Make choices that support you in moving forward in your life. It is all about choices. Choose to forgive yourself and then move forward and let go of your past. One must choose to live for today and enjoy the journey of life itself. Let us join our hands together by sinking our differences and work united to spread Global Peace and Universal Brotherhood amongst masses of this universe very truthfully!
(Photo-1,Jesus had asked for God's forgiveness of those who had crucified him. Photo:2-Mahatma Gandhi,an apostle of Peace and non-violence.Photo-3:Praying blond girl kneeling on a church chair with folded hands and eyes up.Photo:4-Businessman begging to a businesswoman
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Bishwa Nath Singh:
It is very rightly said that there is no love without forgiveness, and similarly there is no forgiveness without love. One must be clear in his/her mind that to forgive is the most beautiful and super form of love whereas in return he/she i...s bound to receive warmth, peace and happiness in his/her life. The forgiveness is one of the main virtues that we possess as godly gift needs to be pursued and cultivated to make our life successful.
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Poonam Matia
very well explained..sir .itz rtly said that ''to err is humane and to forgive is divine ''..itz so easy to punish sm one for the mistake committed but forgiving is a way to change His life for better and very few can use this virtue in a true spirit ..poonam.
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f.b.
May 24,2011
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